onemillion | unknown seas inventory

KEEPING

★ Jacket: A military-inspired coat created by Forrest.
★ Biocomputer: Have you ever wanted to own a head in a jar? Well congratulations, you now possess one (1) head in a jar! He appears to be asleep right now. (Retrieved from Nandor. Also this is a fake!!!! Which is for the best but still, who does that.)
★ Crystal Skull: A skull carved from pure rock crystal. Some think skulls like this were created hundreds of years ago, perhaps with alien intervention, and consider them "OOPArt". (Courtesy of Hagakure.)

★ 03. Tea Variety Pack: An assortment of different teas, mostly green tea blends. If you find one you like, better hope another one of these drops, because there’s only one of each in here! (x3)
★ 04. Hand-Made Paper: Just a loose stack of really fancy bespoke paper! To make those letters you write in case of your death really pop, you know?
★ 15. 9999 in 1 Game Device: A handheld device for playing retro games! There’s actually only about twenty, they just repeat in the menu until they reach 9999. Also they all suck.
★ 21. Labcoat: A standard white labcoat, perfect for pretending you’re a lab assistant to some kind of professor!
★ 29. Bible+: A copy of the Bible! Hang on, there’s an extra section at the back… why is there a copy of the script for the live-action Need For Speed movie in here?
★ 39. The Dreaded Knarrevik: An IKEA-branded nightstand! Comes unassembled in-box with the instructions missing. Good luck!
★ 49. At-Home Planetarium: A glass ball that lights up and projects stars! Doesn’t work if the room is too big or if the lights are on, though.
★ 54. _____ in Wonderland: A copy of Alice in Wonderland, except Alice’s name has been replaced with yours. That’s the power of public domain, baby. (x2, It would be kind of weird to give this to anyone else...)
★ 55. Pep Bar: Sort of a combination energy and candy bar? Guaranteed to put a pep in your step! (x2)
★ 60. Toy Car: A small, RC car! Race them around!
★ 63. First Aid Spray: A can of medicinal spray, courtesy of the Umbrella Corporation. Its instant-healing effects don't work here, unfortunately, but it'll at least clean wounds out to keep them from getting infected. Ironically.
★ 65. Snackoos: A sizable vacuum-sealed bag of cylindrical chocolate-covered crisps. Not only are they tasty, but they also make a satisfying "ka-tonk" when thrown.
★ 65. Starfleet Uniform: It's a Starfleet uniform! They come in red (command and navigation), blue (medical/science), and gold (engineering/communications). Which one will you wear? Go nuts, it's a classic cosplay!
★ 74. Those Who Sunbathe In The Dark: A beach towel with an interesting design. (x2)

★ 41. “Letter Opener”: A serrated combat knife that wouldn’t be out of place trying to survive in the wilderness.
★ 42. “Almond Flavoring”: A tightly-sealed vial of some kind of powder with a skull and crossbones on it and a very direct warning label informing the reader that it’s Literally Just Cyanide. (x2)
★ 43. “Extra-Large Spice Grinder”: It’s. It’s just a full-on Medieval-style mace.
★ 44. “Personal Space Reminder”: A small handheld device that, when you press a button, generates an external current of electricity. Could be dangerous if you touched someone with the electric parts!
★ 45. “Social Distancing Device”: A six-foot-long staff, with a pointed blade at the end. Yep, it’s a spear! Has all the powers of a spear, too. Like stabbing.
★ 70. “Deluxe Letter Opener”: A one-and-a-half handed sword of decent make! For when you want to go Medieval on someone. (x2)
★ NAME: Description.

TRADING

★ Blue Astro Morpher: A wrist-worn device with a number pad - if you enter numbers, it repeats them in a funny voice, but that’s about it.
★ Surfboard: Perfect for cruisin' the ocean, catchin' big waves, or plowing yourself into the nautical abyss. Oof, too dark? (Courtesy of Dandy.)

★ 05. Life-Sized Stuffed Penguin: A stuffed penguin about a foot and a half tall. Looks almost real, but is almost unbelievably soft. (x2)
★ 06. Ten-Gallon Hat: A hat perfect for wearing in a western - or on stage singing country music. Yeehaw!
★ 07. Nisse: A stuffed friend for the holidays, or really any other time of the year - Gaze upon it, love it, take it home.
★ 08. Malört: A bottle of a foul-tasting liquor produced and distributed exclusively in Chicago, Illinois. It’s literally named after wormwood, if you don’t like strong and bitter alcohol you’ll probably have a bad time.
★ 09. Marionette: An intricate and complex puppet that either looks creepy or cool, depending on your point of view. Surprisingly fun to mix and match with each other! (x2)
★ 18. Wizard Hat: A big pointy blue and silver hat! For commanding mystical energies, or maybe just looking like a dork.
★ 19. Velvet Cape: A full velvet cape, perfect for swishing around and pretending you’re either an old-timey aristocrat or a vampire. Also useful if you wanna get a LARP started in here. (x3)
★ 22. Weirdly Specific T-Shirt: Hang on, how many people does this actually apply to? Also it’s like size XXXL.
★ 24. Punk Jeans: A pair of black skinny jeans torn and safety pinned back together so thoroughly, you’re not sure how much of the fabric is left. But hey, they fit!
★ 26. Distinguished Dress: A beautiful, beautiful… article of clothing.
★ 32. Bootleg Bear Plush: A plush of some strange bear that’s black on its right side and white on its left, with one poorly-stitched red eye. Who is he? Why is he here? He has a terrible aura…
★ 33. Trust Exercises and You!: A thorough guide to conducting, coordinating, and adjudicating exercises from the classic trust fall to the more advanced. Be the self-made king of your workplace and transmit all your good vibes with this book from wordsmith and morale expert… the name seems to have been blacked out? (x3)
★ 35. Plastic Mask: For when you want to look… Handsome.
★ 36. Shovel: A normal shovel. For digging. You know, with all the dirt you have access to. (x2)
★ 37. Do-It-Yourself Mime Kit: A very fancy makeup kit! All in shades of white and black. If being a mime isn’t your thing, it might Miraculously help you fit in with a different group of people…
★ 39. The Dreaded Knarrevik: An IKEA-branded nightstand! Comes unassembled in-box with the instructions missing. Good luck! (x2)
★ 40. Pin-Up Calendar?: A calendar for the year 1965, featuring lurid pictures of… large men in full diving suits? (x2)
★ 51. Foam Dart Pistol: A small pistol that uses pressurized air to shoot foam darts! No notable brand, but it works well enough. (x3)
★ 56. Stuffed Big Daddy: A stuffed toy shaped like… a huge man with a drill for a hand? Don’t worry, he’s soft!
★ 57. Atlas Shrugged: A hardbound copy of Atlas Shrugged by Ayn Rand! Makes for poor reading, but fantastic kindling!
★ 59. VILE-Brand Pen: A souvenir waterproof pen with the acronym VILE on it. Great for signing checks!
★ 64. Nectar: A portion of nectar from the realm of dreams, treasured and consumed by the álfar. Equal parts floral and sweet in taste, it's surprisingly pleasant to drink regardless of your usual inclinations...and don't worry if you feel a little strange after drinking it, that's probably just your imagination.
★ 65. Gyro's Oxy-Chew: It provides water, oxygen, and nutrition. And tastes terrible! Black licorice?!
★ 65. Soldiers of Smile Flyer: A loud, glittery poster that advertises an upcoming performance of the Soldiers of Smile: a traveling troupe of performers seeking to spread smiles the world over!
★ 66. Teacher of the Year Plaque: It's a wooden plaque with a red apple on it, proclaiming someone named William Schuester the Teacher of the Year in 2012...except there's sloppy quotes carved around the word Teacher. How rude!
★ 68. Otamatone: The future of music is now!!! Beep. (x2)
★ 71. Distinguished Dress (Retro): The King Returns.
★ 75. Prosecutor’s Badge: Show it to everyone you know! You’re an officially licensed prosecuting attorney!
★ NAME: Description.

GONE

★ 100% Sunshine Girl Umbrella: A cheery yellow umbrella with a teru teru bōzu attached to each tip. Used for when you absolutely need sunshine. (Returned to Hodaka.)
★ Mage's Staff: Inset with a red orb at the center, this staff probably gave hundreds of stat points at some point, but now it's only good for making pleasant jingling sounds. (Returned to Seo Dawon.)
★ Dildo Nunchucks: Two rather floppy, oversized dildos covered in—is that blood? Uh. (Left with the vending machine.)
★ Motive Disc: A case with a DVD disc inside. Is there even a way to play this here? Either way, the label on the case has a familiar name written: Yasuhiro Hagakure. (Returned to Hagakure.)
★ Grimlock Action Figure: Mint in box, no less! Note: does not transform or rampage on its own. (Returned to Misfire.)
★ Leather Wallet: An old leather wallet, which contains: an aarp card, an old photo of the Blackhawks, and a drivers license for Zinda Blake, with a birthdate that makes no sense. (Returned to Zinda.)
★ Two .45 Pistols: Perfect for dual wielding. Do not separate them!!! (Returned to Zinda.)
★ Flirty Ribbon: A pink hair ornament featuring a large bow-shaped ribbon with small pearl embellishments. Give it to someone you care about, or someone you just want to wish luck in battle. (Returned to Forrest.)

★ Mabo Curry: A unique delicacy that is relatively well known. Do you have the sheer cojones to try out this rather spicy dish? (Courtesy of Vholran. Thrown out, because food from the vending machine is a bad idea.)
★ 02. Hot Sauce: A bottle of very strong hot sauce! Use at your own risk! (Left in suite 4's kitchenette.)
★ 10. Mango: A relatively high-quality mango, which might be surprising the longer into this whole thing you get one out of the machine. You could make a religion out of this. (Thrown out.)
★ 12. Live Bait: A styrofoam cup just… full of worms. In case you want to go fishing, or pull a really mean prank! (x3, returned to the garden.)
★ 13. A Gallon of Seawater: Literally just some seawater spills out onto the floor from the mouth of the vending machine. Why this? (Reasons why Rossiu shouldn't wear his uniform to redeem coins...)
★ 14. Coconut: It’s a coconut. Secretly, as a food famous for floating, it’s suffering more than any of you, but it refuses to complain… (x3, left in the restaurant.)
★ 27. Gingerbread House: A whole elegantly designed gingerbread house with all kinds of candy accents. (x3, left in the restaurant.)
★ 28. Freeze-Dried Ice Cream: Pretend you’re an astronaut! Only available in vanilla, but there's an ad on the back for other flavors. (Left in the restaurant.)
★ 30. I Can’t Believe it’s Not Margarine!: A single stick of unsalted butter. Better refrigerate it. (x3, thrown out.)
★ 31. Hand Bra: Who the heck left this in here? It almost seems like it belongs in a whole other world. (x2, left with the vending machine.)
★ 46. An Egg: Can the vending machine offer you one of these in this trying time? Hard-boiled, at least. (x2, Don't trust food from the vending machine!!! Thrown out.)
★ 53. Gamer Fuel: It’s.... a salt shaker? Full of salt? (Left in suite 4's kitchenette.)
★ 64. A Bag of Chocolate Chip Cookies: Homemade and full of chocolate-chip goodness! (Left in the restaurant.)
★ 69. A Cool Refreshing Beverage: Nice! (Left in the restaurant.)
★ NAME: Description.